Covid-19 is upon us and since there is no vaccine, isolation is the name of the game. The introverts among us may be cheering but for those who struggle with pornography, isolation can pose a risk to their recovery.
Isolation and social distancing don’t have to spell the end of your recovery though, it just takes some intentionality. Here are 7 achievable tips to keep you on the up and up.
1.Keep up your accountability by phone or video call
Just because you can’t meet face-to-face doesn’t mean you should quit or put a ‘pause’ on accountability. Do not use Covid-19 as an excuse to drop off the face of the Earth and avoid honest conversations about your recovery, but rather be even more intentional about staying in touch during this tough time. Pick up the phone or video-call your accountability partner at the regular time that you would normally meet-up and continue celebrating your victories, admitting the lapses and strategizing for the near-future. Accountability can still thrive when done remotely.
Do not use Covid-19 as an excuse to drop off the face of the Earth and avoid honest conversations about your recovery Click To Tweet2. Keep up (or start) a healthy lifestyle from home
Regular exercise and a balanced, healthy diet are essential to recovering from pornography addiction and managing mental health.
While you may not be able to head to the gym, browse Youtube for free workout videos you can do at home with minimal equipment. There’s lots out there! I love The Body Coach TV, it’s like working out with a sweaty Russell Brand and I appreciate that he struggles through every workout just as much as I do!
If you’re not able-bodied enough to do a HIIT or weights workout, that’s okay. Look up some gentle stretching guides or chair-yoga to keep you moving and if you can, avoid staying stationary on the lounge or bed for long periods during your isolation. Of course, this isn’t always possible.
Regular exercise and a balanced, healthy diet are essential to recovering from pornography addiction and managing mental health Click To TweetNutritious food is a little more of a challenge with all the panic-buying and restricted access, but if you can afford it and if you can actually get to the shops or have someone deliver produce to you, plan some meals in advance. Browse Pinterest for nutritious, (tasty) long-lasting meals and avoid ending up with a pantry full of just pasta and rice. Look for frozen fruit and vegetables, dried lentils, flavoured tuna or tinned chicken, beans and experiment with less common foods like Kangaroo mince or tempeh. If you’re ordering in, go ahead and indulge but make sure there are lots of nutritious meals in amongst the pizza!
3. Isolate, but stay connected to community using technology
There’s something special about seeing friends and family in the flesh, but you can still enjoy the benefits of relationship by connecting online or by phone.
Make sure you schedule regular catch-ups with your friends or family during isolation by phone, Zoom, Skype or Facebook call or utilize apps such as Marco Polo for ongoing video chatting. Texting and messaging are great tools for staying connected too, but make sure you do see someone’s face and hear their voice regularly as well.
If you’re part of a community that meets regularly like a church or support group, many of these are hosting live or recorded events online, which is a fabulous way to stay engaged with community. Bonus: you get to wear your P.js! If your particular community isn’t online yet, look around for one that is. If you’re looking for a women’s recovery group online, Lacy Bently runs one for free every week and Small Groups Online offer regular women’s groups via Zoom.
The Grace Spot hosts a private women’s only Facebook support group that you can request to join here. It’s a great place to connect with other recovering women and encourage each other, whether or not there’s a rogue virus!
4. Avoid lazing around. Keep a routine and stay busy with constructive activities
Taking time off work or school, sleeping in and watching Netflix all day sounds like a dream to most people, but if you do this every day for fourteen days (or longer) you may end up feeling pretty down. It’s important to keep up some kind of routine while youre stuck at home to avoid boredom and feeling ‘blah’ because those feelings so often tempt people into using pornography.
The following websites have helpfully created some lists of activities you can work on while home and some suggested routines. You don’t have to follow them precisely but be inspired and work out your own plan.
7 Things To Do While Self Isolating Without Self Sabotaging
Things To Do: Social Isolation Edition (Reddit)
100 Things To Do While Trapped Inside
Our Kid Routine During Social Distancing: A Totally Non-Pinterest-Worthy Schedule
Coronavirus: Five Ways To Work Well From Home
5. If you’re scared or anxious, limit your media intake and talk to someone about your fears
Anxiety helps no-one and can only be a trigger for wanting to escape into fantasy.
Media outlets should be fined for the hysteria they have caused over this virus. Many of them have gone beyond informing citizens and have been straight up fearmongering. It’s terrible and has caused endless anxiety, contributing to the great toilet paper panic which our grandchildren will surely hear about in years to come.
If you are feeling frightened, switch off the TV and log out for a while. You can get essential, reliable information from the World Health Organization, your local or federal government websites (Australians, click here) or directly from your GP if you are unwell. Stay informed, but don’t immerse yourself in news or social media 24/7.
It helps to talk about your concerns with a trusted person, so pick up the phone or talk to someone in your household about what’s going on for you, and ask for some emotional support. Many therapists are offering online Zoom sessions during this time as well, so whether you regularly see a professional for anxiety or not, services are available to you. Alternatively, in Australia you can call Lifeline to talk to someone for free.
6. Make use of discounted recovery tools
A number of pornography recovery organisations are offering discounted or free courses and services during this unprecedented season of isolation and disruption. They know men and women in recovery are going to need additional support to continue their recovery right now. Utilize them.
Ever Accountable is offering free accountability software until May 10th.
X3church are offering their workshops at a 50% discount with the code ‘COVID19’.
I am currently offering Restored as a free download until Friday 20th March PDT.
7. Help others and ask for help if you need it, too
If you are able and it is practical, help others who may need it. Service is a significant part of recovery as it refocuses your attention toward others, and just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside!
Call your elderly neighbours or those you know are immune-compromised to check-in, drop some toilet paper and pasta on someone’s doorstep or help share information about any local community organisations offering food or support. You might even be in a position to offer to pick up someone’s medication or groceries from the store if they are unable to.
If your door needs to stay firmly shut, you can still serve from the comfort of your home! Help your local small business owners or self-employed friends by going online and purchasing their products or vouchers that you can use at a later time. If money is tight, support them by liking, sharing and commenting on their social media posts or leaving positive reviews. That stuff can make their day and increase their chances of getting business.
During this confusing time, do what you can to spread joy and positivity in your community. It will help others and it will help your recovery.
Don’t forget to also reach out for help if you are the one in need. Whether it’s practical or emotional, we all have days that we need support and there’s no shame in it, especially right now. Please, don’t be embarrassed to ask for groceries, a meal, toilet paper or to pick up the phone and dial a counselling service if you need to talk it out. Let’s do our best to be here for each other during this time. It’s not every person for themselves, we’re in this together.
The future is bright
Life as we know it has been turned upside down and the possibility for triggers are endless, especially when you’re trapped inside. Your recovery doesn’t have to suffer though. You can even enjoy some of this time-out from regular life! With some intentionality and planning, you can create a routine and continue practicing everything you’ve learned so far in recovery, and you can keep learning and growing for as long as this dreaded virus roams the globe. We will all get through this.