Destroying a porn habit is a good, good thing.
But are you nurturing healthy ones too?
As you recover, you kill off a part of yourself that hurt. You close a door in your mind and walk in freedom. But, often it feels like you’ve mined up a huge part of your life and there’s a gaping, big hole left. This is unnerving. Unsettling. So you start to fill it, just to take the edge off the emptiness…
The world has a litany of options for hole-filling. Once porn is out of the mix, other mood-altering habits can drop in. Excessive shopping, obsessions, social media addiction, comfort eating, over exercising and drinking are a few common replacers.
I often find myself moment-by-moment checking my Facebook, Instagram and emails. Even when I’m out with friends. It’s comforting. I’m constantly waiting for the affirmation that will come in the form of a little red notification or heart. Shopping also fills the void inside. Pretty dresses will make me pretty, right? But they’re never quite enough when I get them home. More money down the drain. Must go again. Maybe shoes next time. And isn’t food such a common struggle, too? It’s a rush of comfort, pleasure and dopamine. It’s like porn’s long lost cousin.
It’s important to make sure you’re checking yourself for healthy (and unhealthy) habits and allowing real conversations with your accountability partner. Dropping porn is hard work, and is totally commendable, but you want to build yourself into a stronger, better woman don’t you? Don’t let yourself slip into other habits which bring you down as well, instead be empowered. Be the best you can possibly be!
Foster habits that increase your health, your joy and your opportunities in life and faith.
Nourish your body and be gentle with it, whilst making it strong, take up interesting hobbies and activities, join a sports team, learn an instrument, enrol in an intriguing course, learn a language, delve into spiritual texts and practices, start a club, or join one. Gather friends around yourself and grow into a splendid, flourishing woman who pursues her dreams and is resilient against that sinking hole that sometimes reappears in times of anxiety or stress.
Don’t get sucked into fleeting, useless habits to replace your porn behaviours, but invest into worthwhile, uplifting and empowering activities. It’s no use emptying your mind of sexual habits if you’re not refreshing your brain with something real and precious.
Enjoy recovering back into the truest form of yourself!